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Warrior Tribute 2: Stepping Out of the Shadow Despite Fear of Judgement


Six years ago, I was on a crusade to get comfortable in and with my body and more in touch with my feminine “sexy” side…which in my mind…should never be shown in public unless you want to be thought of in a certain way.

What is the first thing you think of when you hear “pole dancing?”


Right??? I did too!!


This is why I never in a million years thought I would be sharing this with the world -- me…pole dancing.


Six years ago, I was on a crusade to get comfortable in and with my body and more in touch with my feminine “sexy” side…which in my mind…should never be shown in public unless you want to be thought of in a certain way.


I had been “fighting” my weight, up and down, for years, and had a lot of shame about my body and what I “thought” I should look like. Despite being a swimmer, I was in the “Fat Club” as a teenager and “too fat to fly” in the Air Force.


In my typical, push myself out of my comfort zone way, I decided to cut right to the core and sign myself up for Pole Dancing classes at Ophidia Studio for my birthday.


This was a life-changing experience for me as I was surrounded by women of every shape and size, honoring the beauty of themselves and their bodies as well as their physical capabilities and personal power.


To truly see a women confident in her body, no matter the size, is a sight to behold.


I’m not gonna lie…climbing a pole is hard…and painful…never had so many bruises in my life.


But watching women who could do it well…holy shit, they were so beautiful, powerful and graceful. It was an amazing feat of prowess to watch and SO INSPIRING.


And the feeling of being able to hold onto a pole without your hands, spin and feel free and strong and capable was addicting!!


Getting comfortable with and showing my “sexy” side was and still is a work in progress. It took a year to work up the nerve to agree to participate in a “show.”


Sexy is still not something that I’m comfortable with as it still feels awkward, dare I say “shameful”…and still feels like I will be thought of in a certain way…


but I’ve learned, and am constantly having to remind myself, that if someone judges, that is their issue, not mine.


AND despite all that, I’m going to honor my Warrior, lean into the awkwardness and the fear of judgments, and do it anyway…


Awkward, real, me…stepping out of the shadow…♥️ And I challenge you… if you find yourself judging…ask yourself why…and where did that come from. That is the journey!! 🥰




 

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